I’m better at posting on Facebook than on here….

A collection of the best ones from the past few months since I suck at updating here…

“Can I just leave the snow on the side of my car?”
…”I’m sorry?”
“The snow? I don’t have to brush it off right? It will just melt?”
…”Uhhh…”

What?

____

“What time is checkout?”
…”11.”
“How far am I from North…Tondawunda?”
…”It depends on where in North TONAWANDA.”
“874 Oliver St.”
…”About 12 minutes.”
“Half an hour?”
…”12 minutes.”
“15 Minutes?”
.. O_o
“Oh.” ……

Are you guys sending people here to screw with me???

___

Guy just walks into lobby. Reads breakfast sign- “Breakfast is from 7-10:30 am”

Walks up to me “So..uh I guess breakfast starts at 8 then?”

Me “O_o”

___

…” I just need a signature here. You made your reservation for two people, so there is an extra person fee of $20.00 plus tax for the third person.”
“WHY?”
…”It’s a standard practice. It covers the cost of facility usage and breakfast”
“That’s stupid. You’re stupid.”
…”I assure you that I am not stupid. If you like I can cancel your reservation. That may happen anyhow if you don’t change your attitude.”

Witch.

___

My bosses son and his friends are playing on the lobby computer. They are 7 and 8 year olds. So the one sits in the desk chair and the other one jumps on his lap.

“AHHH Why are you sitting on my lap!?”
…”You’re in the way!”
“SKIN ON SKIN CONTACT. AWKWARD!!!!!”

Where do they learn these things?

____

Woman walks into lobby with son behind her

“Gooood moooom gooooo!” In that snotty whiny voice.
I laugh and say “I have duct tape if you need it” tee hee
“Did we come up and ask for tape?”
…”No. I was talking about.. nevermind.”
“Oh. My son. Yeah that’s none of your business”

….Sorry lady. Was cracking a joke. Since you obviously don’t discipline your kids and let them speak to you however they want. Let’s see how that works out for you in ten years.

___

Dear Canadian dude in lobby with Buffalo Bills Sweatpants – you HAVE to wear boxers when you wear pants like that. Please. For the Love of God.

___

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